How can we turn fear into a tool to grow and improve our confidence? How can we distinguish when fear is toxic and when it can be a catalyst? These are some questions I discussed with Rebecca Plautz, mompreneur, photographer, and coach.
What you will learn in this episode:
- How to conquer fear and turn it into your best friend
- How fear influences us for better or worse
- Difference between toxic fear and productive fear
- How to have a more confident mindset
About Rebecca Plautz:
Rebecca Plautz is a midwest Mompreneur in central Wisconsin that connects you to small consistent shifts to create giant forward momentum of your busy mind, unloved body, & low energy. She is Your Connection Strategist & the Co-Founder of the virtual workspace & community, OP.WP. that invites you to step into your purpose DAILY - through Action, Connection, Strategy, Networking, & Growth!!
We are "On Purpose. With Purpose." -- Where you always have someone!!
Rebecca makes sure inspired action & FUN follows her wherever she goes.
When she arrives you’ll be sure to find her on the dance floor with her three Bold, Confident, & Courageous Future-Preneurs her & her husband are fearlessly raising in Wisconsin together.
Connect with Rebecca:
TP: Welcome, today we are speaking about fearless life and my guest is Rebecca Plautz. Welcome, Rebecca.
RP: Thank you, Tuuli. Thank you for having me.
TP: It's so great to speak about being fearless. But before that, could you please share with us how you became an entrepreneur?
RP: I am a photographer by trade with my entrepreneur journey, and that actually happened from being wrongfully fired from a retail job over 10 years ago. And that when that happened, they really were saying that I wasn't cut out for customer service. I was fired for perception. Basically, I didn't smile enough. I wasn't enthusiastic enough for customer service. And from that point, I was like, “Screw the man. I'm going to, you know, make my own way, decide when I'm good enough and not let someone else tell me that". And from there, I figured out what is the one thing that I wanted to do that I could be passionate about. And I moved into taking night classes to learn photography because I liked to take pictures at the time. And mind you, this was fearful to even say that because I didn't have a professional camera, it was really just a girl that liked to take photos with a with a point and shoot little disposable camera. And I like to capture moments. And what I really found out five years into photography was that it wasn't taking pictures that I was passionate about. It was really the connection that I was making with the people that I was photographing. I found out that I'm really good at helping people see who I see in them and who they can become more than just taking a picture. It was very much about capturing the essence of the person in the moment that I fell in love with. And so five years into that journey, I found empowerment, boudoir photography, and because that human connection piece is there and you can't get more intimate and personal than that, that was really where I started to pick up my entrepreneur journey in being a photographer and then starting with confidence. That was something that my family had always said "Becky, you're so bold, you're so confident. Like, how do I get that more?" And for the longest time, I didn't realize that that was even a strength that I could help support other people with. But that's how my journey began, was someone telling me I wasn't good enough and I was determined to prove to myself and that I didn't have to listen to the negativity that someone else thought of me that I knew wasn't true.
TP: And it's in a way it's weird, because now with this boudoir photography, you are doing exactly that client service work.
TP: In the most intimate way and in the most deepest way.
RP: Yes. Yeah. It's so fulfilling to I fell in love with the transformation, right. From someone coming in and maybe being a little bit confident and then flipping the switch to that, really amping that up and helping them see who other people see in them and the potential that as human beings, we don't tap into enough because we have disbelief in ourselves a lot. And that's where, you know, my whole thing is helping people understand fear can really be a benefit to us. So that was that was a big thing that I learned through my entrepreneurial journey, was that fear can really be a positive thing when you think about it differently than what we've probably all been trained and grew up understanding about.
TP: We started to speak about fear… People can have moments, fear moments with so many things, how fear has influenced your life? Can you tell us?
RP: Yeah, I mean, so the fear of, definitely right in that story that I was just sharing, the fear is well, "Am I good enough? Well, were they right? And can I, you know, be an entrepreneur?" I didn't actually even know what that word meant when this was happening to me. I really wasn't aware of that. And how, you know, as an entrepreneur and a business owner and a solopreneur or like all of these things, we have to work through fear constantly. We don't have other people doing the work. It is, it is us. And that was something that was fearful right out the gate. It was figuring out that unknown of "Whatdoes this mean now and how am I going to do it?" And so that was a huge part of really picking up that. People were telling me that I was confident and bold and I started to realize that that was actually a tool that I use for myself to keep pushing forward and to gain momentum in my journey. That was a huge influence for me and a pivotal moment. But I think really what comes through the influence side of fear has, what it gives us when we realize that is, you know, it's that honesty, it's that accountability to go for what we want and to have fun with stuff because, you know, whether we do it or we don't, we're going to learn one way or another. And that's how we grow as humans. So, I mean, fear is just it influenced us so, so much. And it can do it in positive ways and negative ways. It's just it really boils down to the mindset. And I'm a huge advocate for for shifting our minds in understanding how we have the power and the potential for anything that we really want. And how we can do that is just is magic.
TP: You mentioned that it's so much about the mindset and I know that you have made fear your best friend. So please tell us, is there a way to identify if a specific fear is toxic or is this beneficial for us?
RP: Yeah, I love talking about fear as a relationship. Right. So I do I equate fear as my best friend a lot because there's a lot of similarities, because when you think about a toxic relationship and anything that you've had in your life that's been more toxic than beneficial, it's more of the they want to be a priority in your life, but they're not willing to put you as a priority. You spend more time on them than they spend on you or focus those kinds of things and fear as a benefit, it does keep showing up for us when we have a thought and we have an idea and we're like, "Oh, that's silly, right?". We put it off and then it comes back again later. And we're like, "No, it's still funny, it's still silly". And then eventually it keeps showing up, right? It keeps appearing to us because it's actually going to be a benefit for us to take action on it. But the fear part is, is that we let it stop us. When the fear sets in and then we keep saying the what ifs, well, "What if this happens and this doesn't work and everyone thinks this is a dumb idea?" Or whatever that might be, but the shifting of into the benefit part is, "Well, what if it works?" What if this is a benefit for your world? What if you sharing one thing that can totally change someone else's world because you shared your experience, you stepped up and even had just like 17 seconds of courage to go for whatever that thought or belief was. You can totally make an impact on other people. And isn't that what we're all here for? We're all here to grow into, to improve as humans. And I think that that's such an amazing way to look at it, because, I mean, we definitely think about pros and cons and situations a lot. I mean, if you think about the what ifs so much, but what if it works? So really, the benefit in the toxicity piece of it is the mindset. It's how we go forward in thinking about things and the people that we allow to speak life to those thoughts and beliefs. So it's always what if it's successful? Yes. And it is good to think about those things to right to know going into it's a smart decision and moving from that space, but it's really like, will this idea, will this thing, when I step through the discomfort that I might feel for a tiny bit, will it impact my world? Will it impact my people, more like at a better level? Right? It comes down to is a good thing for other people or will it hurt someone? That's really where the toxicity comes from. Is it selfish or is it selfless to share or to do the thing that you're thinking about? I think it just really boils down to coming to that moment and realizing, is it for you, is it for other people to benefit from? Because a lot of the times that's just how we can figure out if it's a benefit and it's just in our head that's holding us back.
TP: So how can we transform this fear into our best friend?
RP: So it really is it's a process to work on your mind set about looking at fear in different ways. So earlier I mentioned a couple of key things like honesty and accountability and fun. Like those are some of the characteristics and the attributes that I look for in my friends. Like the closest people to me, they have to be fun. Life is too short to leave the sucky pieces in the places for too long. Like, yes, that stuff happens. That happens for reasons to help us take what we can learn and grow and then turn around and teach it to other people, help them move faster through it, too. I mean, it's just it's a benefit to have fun in life. And the accountability, these are so these are real key points that I've pulled through to know that our best friend is honest to us and they give us the real talk. They don't water down the versions of the truth to us because they do have our best interests in mind. When you think about your best friends, they're not going to tell you that you look really great in something if it looks really terrible and you know that, you would hate it if you were like, "Yes, that looks so great". You know, we rely on those trust and opinions a lot, but fear is really presenting us with the truth and it's waiting for us to respond. That's really what our fear is doing. And we keep pushing it down and pushing it away because it's it's uncomfortable. But when we fear, people fully seeing who we are, that's dishonest to ourselves. And it's, fear really does have our best interests in mind, it's really framing it to understand why we're feeling the negative side. And then how you can actually take action is start to think about the what if positively and catching it is is the biggest part, right? Awareness is the biggest thing to move from. So it's really getting aware of your thoughts in a tool that I love is putting pen to paper like good old fashioned. Get your thoughts out of your head and fully start see them. I mean that is what I tell my clients and my people in my world all the time is. A lot of the times we don't really think twice about our thoughts, we just roll with the first thing we think until we can fully see it and how it's transforming in her head, it can go south real quick and you can be in that negative slope. And then nobody's giving you the accountability either, right? Like our best friends, they will they will show up and be like, well, "Hey, you said you were going to call me. You didn't call me". And that's accountability. Like to say you said you were going to do this thing, but you didn't do it. What's up? And then fear, on the other hand, it's like you can get the things done and move out of your comfort zone. But to be more and to want more, like you have to step through those fears and go through the sucky parts, too, because the motivator is really you can shrink back and stay stagnant or you can show up and grow and help the people around you grow by doing that.
TP: You mentioned this helping part, and this is a question to you as boudoir photographer, how much your clients need your ability to go through this fear part into this maybe like comfort zone or, actually even to this fun part? How much you use this part of your coaching and work for your photography work?
RP: I am a full, experienced person in my photography. Actually started out simply being that a photo shoot day and it's a 12 hour day for one client for me, because it's a full experience, professional hair and makeup, massage afterwards, same day, revealing all of these things that make sure that it's a once in like a once in a while thing, that someone really treats themselves to fully see themselves. And the confidence mindset piece was something that I knew had to happen because so many women would say, "Oh, my gosh, that sounds incredible, but I could never do that". The confidence mindset was definitely not there. And so many women, because they didn't see themselves as someone with the ability to show up in that way. And the coaching side of things I've brought in in the last couple of years because I was like, that needs to be there. So many women say they want to do this experience and have it and really feel it. But they're stuck in the mindset of but "I can't do that, that that's not me", but they've never opened enough to even explore that and have the adventure and the fun to know if it's true or not. They get stuck in that mindset. So it's a huge piece of what I do now. I actually work with clients on a six month or three month basis on working on their confidence mindset. And then the photoshoot anchors down the transformation and shows them and captures the essence of who they have transformed in, so that it sticks, it sticks to them, and they can fully step into that transformation that they've worked through and really own the person that they can see through my lens.
TP: I’d love to come to your photoshoot. The small problem is that we are in quite different areas… or countries.
RP: You got to know what's really cool is that my dream is to, my dream is has always been to travel the world and capture the essence of women all over the world. Wherever your dream photoshoot is, whether that's in a waterfall, whether it's in the black sand beaches, desert, whatever it is like traveling and giving this full experience to women that are just ready to do it in the most epic fun way. And traveling is definitely something that I was missing so much this year for sure. But that is my dream, I've done a photo shoot in Iceland. I've done a photo shoot in Cancun. That is actually what my dream is, to do it every year. I do have a home studio in Wisconsin and the US and that's where I've started it. But the dream is to travel and bring this to women all over and go where they're where I can capture their essence.
TP: So let's hope that all this current craziness ends soon and you can come here to make a great photoshoot.
RP: So, yes, I look forward to that for sure.
TP: So now it's time for our Quick Tips section. This is something we do have regular on our podcast. My question is, what's your biggest revelation about living fearlessly?
Fear really is about tapping into that potential and knowing that we can be better. And I always say, you know, even one percent better a day. Can you do one percent better than yesterday? - Rebecca Plautz, Podcast Step Up & Thrive
RP: Oh, biggest. I mean, the biggest part of it is that it opens the door for opportunities. It's all about intentional growth, right? And stepping through it and knowing that, you know, you're smart enough to figure it out when the ebbs and flows are happening. The right timing is there. It's being open to knowing, like, "OK, I'm about to learn a real lesson here. Let's see what I can take and absorb and then turn around and teach". And it's really about tapping into that potential and knowing that we can be better. And I always say, you know, even one percent better a day. Can you do one percent better than yesterday? And at the end of a year, that's 365% better. Like how much growth can happen for you understanding that? It's just it blows my mind when we break things down into the small, consistent shifts that we can have in our life that really create the giant forward momentum that we all crave and earn for as humans. That's what we're here for, is to just keep getting better. And I just that's the definitely the number one thing that I would say is, is take a small step. I love when I get to share and give to audiences. And then my always call to action is like take one thing that you learned here and take a small action before you leave the space that you're inspired in, because we can consume and consume so much content these days, especially with the world being remote and virtual. It's like, we need to move into action to get the momentum to flow and go, and we're stuck in the fear, in the paralyzation that might happen instead of taking the action to get the momentum going
TP: Thank you. Take some action. Don't stay in the status quo. Nothing will change then. Thank you so much, Rebecca, for joining us and sharing all these great tips. And if our listeners would like to know more about you and follow you. Where can they do so?
RP: Yes, so if you're interested in learning about the empowerment boudoir side of things and the mindset coaching, that's actually on my website, RebeccaPPhotography.Com . And I also am the co-founder of a virtual workspace and community called On Purpose with Purpose. And that's really inviting you to step into your purpose daily through action, connection, strategy, networking and growth. So all of the things that I've talked about, it is really that small shifts that can create the giant momentum. I have a virtual workspace and community that is directed straight for that and it's virtual. So to you and your your country, like anyone that's listening, can tap into that support system. And our tagline is "You always have someone". So that website, you can check this information out that's WorkOnPurposeWithPurpose.Com. And I would encourage you guys to check it out and come join us and see what we have in store for you.
TP: Lovely. Definitely. We do that. And you have a great offer to our listeners. You have a special clarity tool worksheet. Can you share a little bit about that and where people can find it?
RP: Yes. Awesome. So if you are in a space where you're like, "OK, I have those negative thoughts, I'm stuck in fear in this one area", right? Of all the things we just talked about, the thing that came to your mind, if you're like, how do I start the process of putting the pen to paper and working through it? I have a clarity tool worksheet that you can actually go on Facebook and search in the search bar for "Your Connections Strategist Tool" and it will pop up. It's made as a group so that you don't even have to give me your email address. You go to this group, you come in the group and it's right there for you to download the free worksheet and take action. So please go to Facebook, search for "Your Connections Strategist Tool", and it's going to pop up for you right there.
TP: And all those notes and links will be also in our episode page. So please come and check from that. And thank you again, Rebecca. It was a great time with you and thanks again.
RP: Thank you for having me. Everyone who listening: love yourself, live fearlessly and make it a great day.
TP: Oh yeah, a fun one.
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